Some days you are the dog, some days you are the hydrant.

Some days you are the pant leg downwind of your dog's Jean Claude Van Damme 'Bloodsport'-high 30 second pee-kick while realizing that Linkin Park lyrics are starting to "speak" to you (yikes)... Unfortunately, most days, in the world of the unemployed, you are just a fixture on the sidewalks of life getting the golden showers of failure again and again...  eek. That's unpleasant.  Anyway, it really is a big fat roller coaster that goes on in your head... but more like the kind that goes backwards and makes you want to vomit at every turn.  Good thing it doesn't last, though... It DOESN'T!  But how do you keep going?  How do you keep the motivation when you just get doors slammed in your face every day?                 Beats the shit out of me.  

Thank goodness there are others out there who can help, too.  In my recent research, I've found a bunch of Unemployment sites to do just that.  Here are a few to get started....

Stuff Unemployed People Like

Wall Street Journal's Laid Off blog

I Need a Freaking Job (if you wanna get all political.)

I Can't Find a Job

Recession Wire

If you haven't yet (like moi, ahem) Tax Tips for the Unemployed

Unemploymentality

What's so Funny about Unemployment

Hopefully some of those will help.  The funny thing is, a lot of them are kind of outdated... the good thing about that is... they've probably gotten jobs.

TGI-EFF.

Typically, for someone who is unemployed, the weekends mean very little.  Other than the lines are longer everywhere and you maaaay actually get to see and speak with human people... if you can actually afford to, that is.  Believe me, we WANT to go out, but let's face it.  The social life mostly boils down to economics.  You have to get creative when you are unemployed broke.


I mean, we're all freaking broke... but there are ways around it to be able to have a little fun... even when you are unemployed.  Now I'm just speaking from basic SINK (single income, no kids) or, well, NINK (you figure it out) point of view, but if you are looking to go out and hang with friends, make it happy hour time and find a great happy hour.  There are some decent ones out there, but there are also some AWESOME ones that you can find if you look and ask around... oh, and bring cash.  Bringing cash to a bar is a pretty novel concept these days, but holy crap it has saved me in the past.  You know what happens, so just try it next time.

I'm curious to hear if anyone else has some 'cheap (and legal) ideas' for the rest of us - obviously it doesn't have to be something amazing I just said 'happy hour' for crying out loud... but maybe something like...

- Checking out local hotel lobbies for conference cookies and juice
- First Fridays/Art Openings - usually free booze, hors d'oeuvres, decent music and great people watchin
- Listening Parties - do we have those anymore?  Cause those were awesome.

I really could use some more ideas... I'm running out.

Oh yea, and have a HAPPY WEEKEND!

Mistaken Identity Crisis

I think that was a puzzle on Wheel of Fortune... 

Identity's a tough one, man.  What you do is very much a part of who you are, whether you like it or not.  And when someone asks you - So, what do you do? - it's an easy one to answer when you are employed.  "Oh, I'm a teacher." or "I'm a chef." or "I'm an Audience Insight Specialist."  (That was an actual title of mine, and yes, it still confuses the hell out of everyone) But when you are looking for work, usually that answer isn't as easy to come by... cause nobody likes to say "uh....... nuthin".

But the good thing is,  it's not all we are about.  What you do is only a PART of who you really are.  Maybe you're a mom, maybe you're a brother, maybe you're the only single thirty-AHEM yr old in your neighborhood with a sleeve tattoo of bar stamps and duffel bags under her barely open poofy eyes walking her dog trying to piece together the events of the previous night... uh, but I'm just spit ballin, here. 

  

Unemployment (as FREAKING ANNOYING AND SUCKASS as it is) can be a good time to look at that.  Instead of basing your identity around what you do, it kinda forces you into looking at who you are and what you really like to do.  For instance, I noticed that I really like being friendly to strangers especially when they don't look at you like you are an asshole.  Weird, YES.  But kinda fun, yep, that too.  I also LOVE to cook... it's like my heroin (jesus it took me 4 times to actually spell heroin right - that's gotta be a good one to not know, right?).  Cooking is really one of my favorite activities and when friends, football and somehow music gets involved, I'm about as happy as I could be.  I like to think that who I am defines me more than what I do.  Cause, honestly, if my jobs were what defined me, I would be freaking Cybil at this point.   

So, if you are unemployed, when someone asks that dreaded "What do you do" question - tell em what you LIKE to do (but still keep in the "looking for work" part cause, again, the goal!) Right now, I'm looking for work (hellO), I cook, I write-ish and I like to make people laugh a little.... hey, I never said you had to be PERFECT at what you like to do, geez.  :)  

The rejection clusterfudge.

That actually sounds way more delicious than what I meant.  It is not a gooey chocolatey batch of goodness that just 'wasn't quite right' (which, in my world doesn't even exist)... Nope!  Lucky you... talkin bout when you totally put yourself out there... are completely honest about who you are, your situation and actually even feel great about telling it... and then... pfffft.  Nothing.  Nada.  Or just a flat out NO, you suck and you seem to be some sort of curse.  YAY REJECTION!


"We're going in a different direction."


"We have reviewed your resume and have decided to pursue other candidates for this position." - love, Ikea (from my actual rejection letter, ok, except the love part)


"I'm sorry, Ma'am, but this card doesn't seem to be working"


"It's not you, it's me"


Fortunately, I didn't hear any of these this past Saturday night (HEY-O :) but I digress.  But those top three quotes I have experienced in the past five days.  I'm not gonna lie - the Ikea one threw me for a crappy loop.  REALLY?!?!  IKEA doesn't want me?!?!  Yea, that hurt.  My brain went on it's own little tailspin.  This is when the rejection fairy starts telling you how much you suck and you'll never get anything... and then, if you are lucky enough, you have friends come around and help you kick that stupid fairy's ass and focus. 


I do think rejection happens for a reason.  At least, that's what keeps me from going COMPLETELY mental.  My feelings are that rejection happens because, simply, it's just not the right fit.  I know, I know... cliches again, but what else you got?  Even freakin Halle Berry gets rejected.  Her husband cheated on her, for crying out loud.  It just happens.  And you can't control it or even know why it happens.  But where you have control over it is how you react to it.


As hard as it is (and it's REALLY effing hard), every day I try and stay positive.  Every day I wake up and think today could be the day I get the "we DO want you, you really are an asset and we were totally kidding about that curse thing" call.  It doesn't always work, and there are going to be plenty of days that you feel like you are in the ocean right at the breakers and you just keep getting pounded by one wave after another after another.  The only thing you can do is get right back up, stand up tall and hope for a little smooth sailing.  Everything is temporary - even rejection.

Next frog, please.

It's funny.  Job hunting is so much like dating it really makes me want to puke sometimes.  Take the interview - just like the first date... you want to put your best foot forward... look your best and be your charming, witty self... 'will we want the same things for the future?  will we have that connection?  will he have the bankroll to fulfill my flashy lifestyle?'  See?  Annoying, isn't it.  Oh, it gets better.  And YES that last one was a joke.

Sometimes it's easy to tell right away.  'Um, (insert name of date/potential new boss/company) you're boring as hell and I can already tell you suck at life. It's not going to work.'  Sometimes it's not so easy - smoke will be blown and those people are everywhere.  You could be having a great time...  learning a lot about the new interest, big promises about your future, meeting the family/new co-workers....  the hope that you won't have to be 'looking' anymore... just an all around exciting time.  

Then you start to notice the little things.  Nothing major at first, but little flags start popping up.  Like... 'oh, you can't pay me at all?/oh, you live in your mom's basement?'... Ok, so I jumped right to the big things, but you're picking up what I'm throwing down, right?

They aren't all going to be the one.  We have to kiss some frogs/work at some not so great places to find out where they are.  There is rejection.  A FREAKING lot of it.  But there are also times when you have to be the one to decide when to walk away, and that can be hard, too.  You really just have to trust your gut.  Listen to that little guy saying if it's right or not.  Have faith that the right one(s) are out there and don't stop looking till you find it.  And I'm told that you'll 'know when you know'.  I'm pretty over the whole process myself, but I'm still not giving up... ever...  

They're hiring!

YES.  Apparently there ARE companies that are hiring.  I know, I know.  You've heard this before.  But being that I still have a bit of lingering positive vibes for the new year somehow, I can't help but want to share the news.

See what CNNMoney.com has to say about some of the Top Companies to work for and what the recruiters say about getting in there.

Check it -

These 25 Best Companies to Work For have at least 700 openings each, totaling nearly 137,000 available jobs. What are they looking for? See what their recruiters say.

Things are lookin up for ol' Gil...

You know, I had this whole thing written.  It had facts, percentages and when I read it it felt like I was sucking on saw dust.  I mean, it's great that December had one of this biggest one month drops in unemployment since 1998.  But facts and percentages don't mean a big pile of doody if you are still unemployed.

However, a wonderful fact is that 2010 is flippin OVER.  I can't even begin to describe the elation of this New Year's Eve simply because I was waving buh-bye to a super crappy year.  I have a feeling I'm not the only one, either.

The job hunting is actually looking up as well.  As I pour through the numerous emails, newsletters, job listings and job boards I get everyday, I have noticed that there really are more positions.  Period.  How awesome is that?  Especially for someone like me who has never really had one career... more like a hundred.  I've been lucky enough to really learn from each position that I've had and been able to weigh through what I am good at and what I'm not so good at.

So this year instead of making a bunch of new years resolutions that will just crap out in the next few weeks, I've decided to set small goals for myself.  And none of them started on January 1st.  I really do want to help other people get through the mental drain that is unemployment and work on getting to that ultimate goal of finding a great job and moving on.

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Here are a few links I have seen recently that may help revive the ol job hunt...

Getting a New Job in 2011: How to Maximize Your Chances

BNet.com is a great site that I check out quite a bit.  They have a ton of advice for getting and keeping a job.

 

7 New Year's Resolutions: Finding a Job in 2011

Vault.com is also a great resource for advice and research.  They have a ton of company profiles listed and great resources on resume and cover letter writing.

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Hopefully you made it through the holidays relatively unscathed and are ready to hit the ground running for 2011.... cause, really, it HAS to be better than last year!!!